Swedes Through My Lens

Apparently it has been exactly one year since I created this blog, so I thought it is somewhat necessary to celebrate by writing a new post. A long overdue one, of course.

To be honest, I thought I would be able to write one blog post per month - but, my last term turned out to be one of my worst busiest ever. At first, I wanted to list down some of my 2018 highlights in this post, but I figured that's too much to do. Instead, I will share five things I've personally learned about Swedes during my time here in Sweden:

*Disclaimer: everything I write here is based on my personal experience and may be biased. 

1. Swedes love their personal space. This is my absolute favorite thing about Swedes: the fact that they value and actually give you your personal space. Have you ever had one of those days when you do not feel like saying a word but end up saying something anyways because you don't want to be seen as a cold person? I've had so many of those days, and during those days, having small talks really drains my energy. The beautiful thing about living in Sweden is that there is no need for such small talks. You literally could go on living in a corridor (like a student dorm with a shared kitchen) without saying a single word, and no one will judge you. Even when you go to supermarkets, the cashier will not ask questions like, "How's it going? Did you find everything you need?" The cashiers will only say: Hej! Do you need a plastic bag? and do you want a receipt?

I love my personal space.

Although I found this strange and uncomfortable at first, but I think I've gotten used to it. And after 18 months of living in Sweden, I think I've become fond of it as well and loved Swedes for being this way. But this side of them brings me to the next point that...

2. Swedes are most often misunderstood. Some people think that Swedes are rude or unfriendly, but I must say that no, Swedes are actually really friendly! I've been here for a while now, and I have not had any unpleasant experience with Swedes. Swedes do not appear as friendly as Americans (especially my fellow Texans) or Indonesians (who can easily be friends with strangers within 5 minutes) because they do not, in general, talk to strangers. I remember being told in my orientation week that Swedes do not greet or make any eye contact (they look down instead) with people they pass by when they walk... Is it because they're rude? Well no, it's mostly because of the darkness and the cold weather. You naturally try to walk faster when it's cold outside (or at least I do), and when it's dark, then you obviously cannot see who's passing by and won't greet them.

Another thing I've noticed is that Swedes will not tell you that you're doing something incorrectly. For example, I saw this one guy struggling to put back a shopping cart because he was putting it back in the wrong place. He struggled for a few minutes; people passed by, but not one person (yes, I was also guilty as charged) told him the correct place to place the cart. I thought to myself, "if this happened in the US, someone would've definitely run up to him and told him what to do..." But that kind of things does not happen in Sweden, unless if you ask someone for help. If you do ask for help, someone will surely help you out. Swedes are friendly in that way, but do not expect them to miraculously come out of the blue and help you out.

3. Swedes are lagom; lagom is Swedes. I'm sure you've all heard the term - lagom - right? It supposedly replaced the Danish concept of coziness - hygge - a while back. If you have never heard of the word lagom, well it simply means just the right amount. Not too much, not too little; just enough. And if I were to think of the one perfect example of lagom - I'd actually say Swedes. The way (most) Swedes behave is very lagom, and that's why- according to a good friend of mine, "Swedes are not annoying." I was shown the picture below about Swedes, which cracked me up but I found to be very true. Swedes practically look the same when they're happy, sad, or angry; they only look different when they're drunk.

My Swedish friends, is this an accurate description of your facial expressions? :)

This also goes along with the idea of personal space, but bus and train rides in Sweden are usually quite peaceful and lagom - not too loud or fast, not too quiet or slow either. People usually do not talk, unless if they are drunk, traveling with other people, or if the bus is full of teenagers, and they would not sit next to you if there's an empty spot elsewhere.

I mean yea, exactly.

Now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever heard Swedes around me laugh out loud - I guess LOL-ing is not very lagom.

4. Swedes are well-dressed, neat, and tidy. When asked about some stereotypes about Swedes 1.5 year ago during my orientation, someone raised his hand and said, "Your (Swedish people's) hair is always neat and tidy." I remember thinking, "what - really? Isn't it true for most people elsewhere?" And it did not take me too long to agree with that guy's statement. I found Swedes to be, most of the time, very well-dressed, neat, and tidy. I think I realized this even more after going back to the US last spring and comparing how differently people dressed there and in Sweden. I mean, I'm not saying that everyone is like this, but in general, it's pretty true. And Swedes tend to wear either black or gray clothes. It's even mentioned here that the dress code for a typical Swede is Darth Vader. This is one reason why I cannot pass as a Swede; I'm that one student in class who usually wears bright pink, red, orange, or purple top.

5. Swedes love to mingle and fika. Not a single semester went by without fika, which is another famous Swedish word that is translated to "a coffee and cake break." But after experiencing fika many times myself, I've learned that the word fika itself means much more than how it's defined or translated. Having coffee and cake by yourself at your desk isn't considered as fika. Fika is an important part of the Swedish culture; it's when you take a break to mingle, socialize, and catch up with friends and colleagues. Fika can also be both a noun and a verb. It really simplifies a lot of things; instead of saying, "let's have coffee tomorrow," you can just say, "fika tomorrow?"

By the way, Swedes also have a lot of yummy cakes and pastries; all of which can accompany you during your fika. Fun fact: I only found out after I moved to Sweden that cinnamon buns are Swedish!

Homemade kanelbullar (cinnamon buns)!

So my dearest readers, those are the five things I've learned about Swedes. I wouldn't lie and say that I fell in love with Swedes and their culture at first sight because I thought they were strange a bit peculiar. It certainly took me some time to get used to the fact that this is how Swedes function/ operate and a bit more to eventually appreciate and love the Swedes and the Swedish culture.

You have probably read or heard everything I listed here before too, but hey - at least now you know that they've been mentioned for a legit reason!

Thank you for reading, and hopefully it won't take me another year to come up with another post :)